Here is an automatic masturbating machine for those who fear carpal tunnel or just don't have the time to use their own hand. My sadistic side is envisioning the poor schmuck who gets his pecker stuck in the machine, only to have the varying speed knob break off once he's cranked the thing up as high as it will go.

Looking at the picture however, it strikes me that the best element might just be the English written on the free box of jelly that comes with the machine. It reads:

SOM Original Jelly For Your Ecstasy Up!
SOM's power's so great. But don't worry, this original jelly can wrap gently and protect you coz we put leaves of peach and aloe in it.